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An Update, Complete With Rambling Thoughts

10/14/2019

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A reader of this blog recently prodded me to write something again, which was a good reminder to me that I occasionally should do something that isn't work. I'm putting in 40-50 hours plus taking two real classes (and a fake one that's one unit) at Georgetown, so my life these days has precious little down time. I'm taking Language Testing, a fascinating class on the theory and practice that underlies assessing people's language capabilities. It has more or less led me to the conclusion that the DLPT is an awful test. According to good testing practice, a multiple choice question should have exactly one correct answer, not "choose the most correct" with three semi-right ones and a flagrant distractor. At any rate, maybe in 30 or so years I'll set out to change everything the DoD is doing as far as language assessment, for now I largely find myself in survival mode.

Being busy is a wonderful change of pace from where I was during the first half of the year. When I was told by my current employer that the contract would almost definitely be finalized in January, I naturally assumed I shouldn't take a full course load. When contract issues arose between the government and my employer, I was left hanging for six. full. months. without gainful employment or a significant amount of schoolwork. One would think I could have written a great deal during that time, but I was trying my best to study Python for an upcoming class and for possible work applications. Mostly though, I spent time at the gym and sitting around at home.

Boredom is extremely unhealthy. Though I think I did a decent job of filling my time productively, in retrospect I'm amazed at myself for how little I truly accomplished. Now that virtually all of my minutes from sunup to midnight are accounted for, I wish I had the kind of time to do random projects like I could earlier in the year. I guess the moral there is to appreciate what you have, even if it doesn't seem like much.

On that note, I recently made a Facebook post proclaiming myself to be thoroughly content with my life. While I do feel like I'm constantly running around, at least there is a profound sense of satisfaction in reminding myself that I'm simultaneously getting paid and working towards a valuable education. I may not see my friends as much as I like these days, but hopefully they'll understand.

Life tends to move in cycles. One season you're essentially stuck in a waiting room, staring at bland walls and outdated magazines. The next season, you suddenly find yourself running a rat race as fast as you possibly can, with no time for second thoughts about life, the universe, and the deeper meaning of it all. The transition period can often be jarring.

I'm also occasionally finding time to be a dad. Seeing Margaret last month was by far the biggest highlight of my Fall. Though the time with her is always painfully short, and the goodbyes are emotionally exhausting for me, nevertheless I'm extremely grateful for every moment I get to see her adorable smile and hear her cute babble. Someday I sincerely hope I'll get the chance to be the dad she deserves. Until then, the grind continues...
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Ethics

5/13/2019

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In times of established order, when the law rules supreme and the transgressor of the law is disgraced and ostracized, it is in relation to the tax collector and the prostitute that the Gospel of Jesus Christ discloses itself most clearly to people. "The publicans and the harlots go into the kingdom of heaven before you" (Matt. 21:31). In times which are out of joint, in times when lawlessness and wickedness triumph in complete unrestraint, it is rather in relation to the few remaining just, truthful, and humane people that the Gospel will make itself known.
-Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Ethics p.58
I've incorporated lengthy references to Dietrich Bonhoeffer into my blog posts before, this time I've tried to keep it brief. This man's work has always spoken to me very deeply, precisely because he refused to stop talking about Jesus, no matter how seemingly hopeless the situation in Germany got.

Bonhoeffer fought for human decency at a time when the world around him was descending into vicious partisanship and xenophobia. When the anti-Jewish rhetoric in Germany reached a fever pitch, he undertook efforts to smuggle Jews out of the country. Since his brother-in-law was Jewish, the issue was very personal to him.

What you do when the world around you goes crazy says a lot about your character, not to mention your situational awareness. Personally, I constantly ask myself how I would respond if I were in a country like 1930s Germany, where you felt palpably that something awful was brewing in the air. Would I flee? Would I do something local? Something national?

The passage in Matthew cited by Bonhoeffer in the quote above contains two parables about how "the kingdom of God will be taken away from you and given to a people who will produce its fruit" (Matt. 21:43). I believe that a time is fast approaching, if it hasn't already whooshed past, when God may take his favor away from us as a nation for failing to produce fruit.

I took a class this past weekend put on by a non-partisan group called Veterans Campaign, designed to prepare veterans for a "second service" to their country as public servants. We were taught from the very beginning that your goal is NOT to become a politician, nor to get famous. Your goal is to represent the people as a humble public servant. This was quite an adjustment for me, since I have previously stated that politics will not save our country. Nevertheless, as I see things worsening by the day in this country, with partisan and foolhardy rhetoric proliferating on both sides of the aisle, I feel I have a moral obligation to do something.

Bonhoeffer talks about the Gospel revealing itself to "the few remaining just, truthful, and humane people." I believe the just people are the ones currently fighting to have children reunited with their parents at the border, and to stop children from dying in US custody. I believe the last remaining truthful thing to do is admit that Donald Trump is a liar and a self-aggrandizing maniac. I believe the last remaining humane thing to do is reinstate healthcare coverage for the millions who were recently kicked off.

In short, I hope in the future to announce my candidacy as a Democrat for a public office. I don't yet know where or when. All I know is that the polices of the current administration have strayed so far beyond the pale of compassion and human decency that they must be fought by all legal means.
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Hate What Is Evil, Cling to What Is Good

3/19/2019

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Romans 12:9-21 English Standard Version (ESV)
Marks of the True Christian
9 Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. 10 Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. 11 Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit,[a] serve the Lord. 12 Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. 13 Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality.
14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly.[b] Never be wise in your own sight. 17 Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. 18 If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. 19 Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it[c] to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” 20 To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” 21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

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I'm currently involved in a Linguistics research project analyzing manifestos written by recent mass-killers. My Forensic Linguistics classmates and I have identified three manifestos written by racist scumbags (I have no more polite way to describe them, and may less-polite ways) which we will be studying for linguistic clues about imminent violence, in the hope of finding commonalities which might be useful in analyzing future examples of hate speech to separate the idle racists from the true lone wolves. It's a difficult task, made more difficult by the fact that it requires close analysis of the addled writings of some deeply hateful people.

Since I've spent the last few days analyzing hate, I thought it would be important to get on here and talk about the importance of true fasting again, but in a slightly different sense from before.

You see, as I've become more acquainted with hateful rhetoric, and even bothered to learn how to recognize covert symbols of hate, I've realized that we as followers of Christ are probably not doing enough in our everyday lives to live up to the command of "hate what is evil." It should never be said that the Bible commands us to hate other people, however in this one case it is very clear: we must take an unequivocal stand against evil. We see in this passage a dual responsibility, both to embrace good AND to resist evil. It is not enough for a gardener to love flowers; they must also hate weeds.

After what just happened in New Zealand, we need to make a bolder proclamation than ever that we as Christ followers are against violence towards outsiders. This shouldn't be a controversial statement, but for some reason the American church has been deafeningly silent on the issue of the human dignity of non-Americans. I blame Trump for this. While conservative America has always had some sort of excuse for why foreigners aren't "real" people, I don't think it's any stretch to say that a self-avowed nationalist who has consistently denigrated Muslims is responsible for the recent increase in xenophobia within this country.

The above passage of scripture calls us to love and be kind to others. You do not get to choose whom you will or will not include in that mandate, with the exception of "as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone." I would never have joined the military if I were a true pacifist, since some people will always have a mind bent on evil. In my opinion, we have a moral obligation to meet such people head on.

For those who abjure violence, I would remind you in the words of George Orwell that, "those who abjure violence can only do so because others are committing violence on their behalf." Rather than outsource your violence to police officers, military personnel, or others who could potentially abuse you as easily as the could protect you, why not take it upon yourself, as a person of strong moral conviction, to prepare yourself physically, mentally, and spiritually for the possibility that you may be called upon to resist evil in a morally responsible manner?
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The Coming Civil War

3/2/2019

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I have no desire whatsoever to write this post. It repulses me to think that this country might be circling back to the position it was in back in the 1850s, when half of the country was so virulently opposed to the political and philosophical convictions of the other half that they ultimately decided violence was the only solution. I recently re-watched Ken Burns' Documentary on the Civil War. Since I've written in the past about my years as a Civil War Reenactor, it should come as no surprise that I see parallels everywhere between that tumultuous time and this one.

There is a gaping chasm of division in this country over the future of its political ideology. Whether the issue is gun control, abortion, gay marriage, or even the legality of building a wall, there is virtually no issue on which the U.S. public (and its lawmakers) are not diametrically opposed. In the 1850s, the hot-button issue of the day was "States' Rights" (the obvious elephant in the room being slavery), and then as now there was a division among the church about how to handle the issue. Some men, such as the would-be insurgent John Brown, believed that violence was the only solution. Others, such as the noble Fredrick Douglass and the radically-progressive William Lloyd Garrison (who was among the first public advocates of both abolition and women's suffrage), decided that political agitation and public discourse were more morally praiseworthy...until the war came.

When the first shots were fired at Fort Sumter, everything changed. Americans North and South were faced with the inescapable choice of supporting or opposing secession, which carried within the folds of its garments many untold evils. Jefferson Davis would later write in 1864 as the Confederacy was uttering its death rattle, "If the Confederacy falls, there should be written on its tombstone: Died of a theory." Since their constitution was founded on the supreme law of States' Rights, his government was never able to unify the Southern economy or war effort to a truly effective degree.

Conversely, Lincoln's newfound dictatorial power (suspending the writ of Habeas Corpus, arbitrarily using the military to arrest any suspected Southern supporter, putting down riots with gunfire) allowed him to unify and mobilize the North
to such a degree that their superior manpower and manufacturing capability virtually guaranteed eventual success (mitigated by the failures of their incompetent generals). Though the superior tactical prowess of the Southern commanders bought time, the war's result was largely a forgone conclusion. Without international recognition (which wouldn't come once the issue of slavery was raised by the Emancipation Proclamation), the "second revolution" was doomed.

Once again, we as a country find ourselves appealing to both State and Federal authority to solve difficult and controversial social issues. Since a representative government has been shown by history to be the least evil of government styles (though obviously  not without its share of problems), it is only logical that elected officials would speak as polemically and virulently as the constituents by whom they are elected.

Unlike a hundred and sixty years ago, there is no true geographical boundary between "North" and "South" today. Arguably, the modern line of demarcation is now between urban and rural value systems, and even that is an imperfect division. I was born and raised in one of the most liberal states in the country, and nevertheless I still proudly espouse God and guns as two things which made this country great. That being said, you all know exactly where I stand when it comes to MAGA types.

I would love nothing more than to be wrong in this case; however my conviction grows with each passing  month that, as Lincoln famously said (quoting Matthew 12:25), "a house divided against itself cannot stand." I foresee no lasting conclusion to this division that does not involve conflict, in part because those like myself who have tried to approach the political center have been savagely criticized and silenced by the hardline wings.

If it ever came to open conflict (and I regularly pray that it doesn't), I still haven't decided which side I would choose. The pragmatist in me says that picking the largely-unarmed side (liberals) would be foolish. Nevertheless, I could also never live with myself if I even once found myself shoulder to shoulder with "white nationalists" fighting to roll the clocks back to a time when racism and curable diseases were the norm. I believe that abortion is the willful and wrong termination of a human life, and I also believe that God does not distinguish between people of various nationalities. For this, I am likely to be banished from both political parties.

If you believe that the Bible is true, you should find yourself at odds with the world. That means that you do not compromise your interpretation of scripture to conform exclusively to one political platform. I will continue to repeat, The Gospel is not a Political Manifesto.

Let us please, for the love of God and our fellow human, stop fighting one another. If we cannot, we may doom ourselves to repeat a bloody chapter of American history.
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Another Trump/Jesus Rant

2/9/2019

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When the likes of Franklin Graham and many other formerly-decent men are now acting as apologists for Trump instead of Jesus Christ, I get upset. I have made no reservations about my disdain for Trump as both a person and public official, because frankly I can't even comprehend how one could defend him. Nevertheless, day after day as I troll through Facebook, people try. I have repeatedly made the case that this is both illogical and unbiblical, nevertheless a vast majority of people who I respect are still dogged in their assertion that to love Jesus is to be for Trump, and to oppose him or support a "liberal agenda" is to oppose God himself.

This is in no way biblical.

While there are a few planks in the Democratic platform which are unequivocally evil, such as late-term abortion, there is really no room for argument that Republicans are always right. This is particularly true when they're defending the death of children in U.S. custody as vehemently as any ultra-liberal, pro-choice activist.

Politics cannot save our society. The Gospel, responsibly preached and correctly applied, can. To argue that there is a biblical justification for the oppression of orphans, widows, and sojourners is to self-hypnotically recite talking points from our modern propaganda outlets like Breitbart and Fox news. I'm not sure how many times I can say this:

The Gospel is Supposed to be Apolitical.

I pinned my 25 Theses to the top of this website because I'm tired of repeating myself in personal conversation. Number Five on that list is designed to illustrate that the Gospel is supposed to transcend the temporary, transient nature of our political order. Of course it should inform our actions, to include how we vote, but the minute you slap a Republican sticker on your Bible cover (or endorse a candidate from the pulpit) as far as I'm concerned, you are officially a heretic.

I was raised in a Wesleyan church. To spare you a boring history lecture, the Wesleyan movement was born out of the Methodist church when a group of ministers disagreed with the Methodist church's decision to bar its preachers from speaking out against slavery in the 1850s. These men of conviction decided that, if the Gospel be true, they had a moral obligation to fight verbally (and even physically as the country descended into civil war) against the evils of human oppression and exploitation.

I believe there is absolutely a place for politically active faith. It just sickens me to see that many who share my belief in the Gospel have lost sight of the precepts it espouses, which are NEVER in favor of bigotry, racism, or the denigration and disregard for the downtrodden.
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A Year In Review

12/31/2018

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I  haven't written anything since the start of the Fall semester, and now seems like an appropriate time to reflect on things. As another year passes into the history books, I'm very thankful for the personal milestones I've experienced, most notably the birth of my daughter. 2018 will be a year for which I am eternally grateful, because it marked the first time I heard my daughter's cry. By comparison, everything else was pretty mundane. Although I knocked out two more semesters at Georgetown this year, and as of a  few hours ago applied to the Master's program, those accomplishments are largely history for most of the people who are likely to be reading this. I'm also excited about a new job which, Lord willing, I will be starting within the coming weeks.

New Year's Eves are a time of special excitement. Not only do we muse about the past, but also look expectantly forward towards the coming year. Many will make resolutions...some will be broken. Rather than bore you with my personal to-do list (although respect to those who are seeking public accountability as they embark on ambitious new projects), I'd simply like to take a moment and remind everyone to be thankful for what you have, most importantly life itself.

I dedicated a podcast to the idea of "memento mori," the Latin phrase for "remember death." Although death is a rather morbid thing to ponder on a regular basis, it nevertheless is an unavoidable part of human existence. I'm reminded of those who lost someone this year, and those who passed on years ago whose memory we still cherish. I was very fortunate when I was home in San Diego recently to visit the grave of a friend (an acquaintance, really; he and my brother were much closer) whom several of us from high school knew. I felt honored to be allowed to join in with his regular friend group on their annual ritual of visiting the grave site when they come to town.
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Life itself is a beautiful gift.

Regardless of how your last year went, or how you hope the coming one will turn out, please always remember that you are still breathing. That by itself is a miracle which shouldn't be taken for granted.

If all your hopes and dreams are tied to this life, your hope is very limited indeed. Those of us (like Josiah) who know Jesus Christ as our personal Lord and Savior have confidence that, whatever number of days are allotted to us on this Earth, they are not the end. If that sounds childish to you, I urge you to consider with childlike faith the possibility that the Bible might actually be true, and that Jesus Christ might actually want you to spend eternity with him in Heaven. If you're willing to follow him, then there will be no end to our days together.

Until next year,
John
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Why I Detest Trump (pt. 2)

8/8/2018

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In case you missed it, Tump has come out strongly in favor of warming relations with Russia. This is problematic for many reasons (I liken it to throwing open the gates of Rome to welcome the Barbarians), but most obviously it overlooks the unequivocal and indisputable fact that Russia interfered in our 2016 election in order to help him get elected. Conservatives everywhere have been systematically lying to themselves and to the wider public, if indeed they truly believe that Russia had no involvement and nothing to gain by seeing Donald Trump elected. Paul Manafort and Rick Gates, one a campaign manager and the other a close associate of the Trump campaign, have both been indicted by a Federal Grand Jury on charges of failing to disclose their foreign income.

While I was home in San Diego recently, I was sharply reminded that my brother and I are the only two people in our extended family who don't support him, and the defense of him was always the same: "What were we supposed to do, vote for Hillary??" Sometimes in life, when you're presented with awful choices, the best response is to simply reject the question. While many decry third party voting as a "wasted vote," it's important to remember that Abraham Lincoln was the first Third Party candidate in history to become President of the United States, and in doing so he transformed the Republican party from a bunch of unknown losers into a major political force.

Also while I was home recently, I had the opportunity to revisit my home church which I was raised in. While it is always a pleasure to see many familiar and beloved faces, it's also mildly discouraging to me to see that absolutely nothing has changed. I've been very blessed and fortunate for the last four years to be part of a church which is deadly serious about making sure their theology is Biblically sound, and that their parishioners are all well-versed in it. Going back to a place where the Gospel is merely a hood ornament on a neo-conservative, pro-Israel agenda reminds me why I stopped going to contemporary (as opposed to Reformed) churches altogether.

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Why I Detest Trump (pt.1)

7/11/2018

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I'm sadly one of a very small minority of people in my family who oppose Donald Trump. Looking back through my old Facebook posts, it seems I made my first anti-Trump post on February 25th, 2016; well before the disastrous election which forced us all to choose between a giant douche and a turd sandwich. 
I also posted the following right after the election:
I bring this up because I recently read an article from the Economist about how young Evangelicals are abandoning the Republican Party in ever-larger numbers. While I struggle to go as far as the notoriously-liberal pundits at the Economist on what this means for the future of the Democratic party, I do agree that the younger generation of religious conservatives in this country have to make some hard choices about how to proceed in this new political climate.

I've written at length before about Isaiah 58, because it is a passage replete with meaning for our present time. One of the evils of Jerry Falwell's "Moral Majority" and its modern successors is that it conflates a sound, biblical faith with the idea that one must necessarily vote conservatively. There are numerous passages throughout both the Old and New Testament of the Bible which at times espouse some decidedly liberal viewpoints, including the requirement of a public safety net. While in general I do agree that a conservative translation of the Bible, as well as a conservative interpretation of it, are fundamental to a sound Christian faith, I can't deny the fact that the Bible is not an inherently Republican manifesto.

Ever since Trump first started his media rampage, he made it clear that he has no intentions of behaving in a humble or compassionate manner, nor of making any remote effort to be truthful. Lately, he has mocked the #MeToo movement and publicly shamed himself with a poem deriding immigrants, to name merely two recent examples of thoroughly un-Presidential behavior. While some of the elder generation may mistake this for mere candor, I find it to be a shamefully and astonishingly unbecoming standard of behavior for the highest office in our land.

I have never claimed to be a person of unassailable character, and I do believe in a God whose grace can cover over any personal faults. I also believe, however, that when a person assumes a mantle of leadership they also accept tacitly a burden of responsibility to act in a dignified, God-honoring manner that befits the trust he has given to them. Because immigrants, women, Muslims, and LGBT people are all image bearers of the Most High God, they are inherently deserving of the dignity and respect that we accord to our fellow believers in Jesus Christ. To believe that anyone is somehow an "animal" (which he narrowly applied to MS-13 members, but has since become a dog whistle for anti-immigrant racism) is not only contrary to our melting pot nation's history, but is at its basest level a denial of the human dignity of even the worst sinner.

Do I believe that immigration should happen legally? Sure. Will I ever support the dehumanization and blaming of an entire group of people for the actions of a few? Never.

God cares about the foreigner residing among us, and to say otherwise is to show one's ignorance of scripture. The Bible is not a Republican (nor a Democratic) manifesto, and to use it as such is to cheapen and defile it with the corrupting influence of human-made labels and political agendas. At number 5 on my list of 25 theses is the admonition that the church of Jesus Christ is not a political lobbying group.

This post is likely to be the first of many where I attempt to show that Trump is neither a good President nor a good reason to abandon sound biblical teaching simply to further a conservative agenda. If that irks and confuses you, then you're exactly who I'm writing these for. Let's just agree going forward that if you love Jesus Christ and his Word, there should be nothing in this life that is more important to you than that.

Buckle up...
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The Love of God

6/19/2018

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Have you ever looked at a tiny human and thought to yourself, "I would die in an unhesitating instant, if it came to that, in order to protect you." ? I was recently struck by that thought, as I trust most parents are, for the first time. You literally don't even have the emotional capacity to process the love of God until you've felt that feeling in the pit of your soul. Jesus, God himself in human form, literally lived out those words for ME. It's a mind'blowing concept if you give it more than a few second's consideration. Jesus did not just step in front of a truck or donate his organs in order to save you, he literally lived an entire human life with full cognizance of the death that awaited him, knowing all along that it was you he'd be saving. His child. God's child for you, and Lord willing for your child as well.

I don't have some lengthy lesson here, that's just a thought that hit me that I needed time to really process in order to share. I may spend the rest of my life processing it.

If you don't have a personal, conversational relationship with God through the sole mediation of his Son Jesus Christ, you are missing out on the greatest relationship of all eternity. If you're unsure of how that all works, I highly recommend you pick up a copy of the Bible (I prefer NIV translation, though there are innumerably many good versions). I literally cannot implore you any more strenuously or simply than that. I built this blog because I made a commitment in my life a long time ago that I would choose to follow the words of the Bible (imperfectly, since we are all still human until we're someday restored to Glory) and to seek after Jesus Christ to the exclusion of all other earthly things and relationships.

I have been blessed in my life to have and to see many good, Christian parents, and in honor of Father's Day and Mother's Day being recently celebrated, I want to say a special thank you to my mom and dad for teaching me early and often about the Bible, because their love means the world to me, but their teaching means eternity.

I have no idea how so many good Christian parents have struggled their entire lives with this concept; that you need to love God more than your spouse, your children, or anyone else this life may give you. I know now how much a person can love their child, and yet God's love is a more perfect form of the mere representation he has given us in creation.

A lifelong friend of mine lost his father unexpectedly back in January. Recently we were catching up on the phone, because I wanted to see how he's doing and to update him on the latest decisions I'm facing in my personal and professional life. His best advice, and I write it here because I want to remember it for as long as the internet exists, is that you should leave nothing undone or unsaid in life if it's important to those whom you care about. For me, that's meant several things, including brazenly declaring my feelings for a few of the most important people in my life, not to mention making potentially life-altering decisions about my career.

My best advice to anyone and everyone is this: don't wait. Undeclared affections may be unreturned, but you will never know until you pluck up the courage and say something. If it's an important declaration that you've been holding on to regarding a family member, say it immediately and often (within reason, of course), and if you have the opportunity to spend quality time with them, do so. There is literally no guarantee in this life that you will die of old age. More importantly than making moves in life though is to make the only declaration that will still resonate in ten thousand years, which is that Jesus Christ is the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords.
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The Problem with Secession

6/2/2018

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Below are photos taken by my aunt when she visited the burial site of our family's ancestors who fought in the Civil War.
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I started Civil War reenacting when I was 14 years old. At the invitation of our aunt and uncle, who were history teachers, our family decided to attend a Civil War reenactment in an abandoned California mining town called Calico. Since then, I've lived in Georgia for several years, where I fell in with another group of dedicated reenactors who portrayed both the 39th Georgia and the 3rd Wisconsin, depending on which side needed more muskets at any given event.

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    I'm J.R., a US Navy veteran and Linguist. This blog is devoted to insights and experiences I've gained over the years.

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